Do you guys remember those old ads? Where the dude would talk about a video game like he just didn’t care about it at all? “Swimming gorillas…” “…blasting barrels…” “…runaway minecarts.” “Donkey Kong Country.” “Rated E for Everyone, on GameBoy Color.” Now Paulie. Play the Japanese Donkey Kong ad. 「 最後 の ドンキー アクシュン 」The latest Donkey Kong Action! 「 ゲーム の アドバンス」On Game Boy Advance! 「 スーパードンキーコング 2 」Super Donkey Kong 2 (western name is DKC2: Diddy’s Kong Quest) 「 ドンキー SP アタ -」Donkey Kong SP sty- And do you guys remember the, uh… Those old ass Crash Bandicoot ads? Where the dude would dress up like Crash Bandicoot? “Excuse me.” “Do you need some help with anything?” “No, thanks.” “Just picking up a few necessities for the road.” “You know, with my new racing game coming out…” “Craaash Nitro Kart.” “heh.” Now Paulie, bring up the Japanese Crash Bandicoot ad. [ unintelligible japanese metal music ] 「 CRASH BANDICOOT 」 「 バトルのカート、これゲット!」 “You get this, the Battle Kart! (as a gift)” “WAH WAH WAAAH WAAAAAAAAAAA!!!” [ Dunkey laughing ] Uh… now Paulie, bring up the Wii U ad for America. “Something’s up with my family…” “…ever since we got Mario Kart 8 for Wii U.” “Everyone seems to be having crazy fun together.” “Mom and dad have been smiling and laughing.” “My big sister and younger brother are actually getting along!” “Mom loves using all the new items” OK, now play the Japanese Wii U trailer. With the horse. 「 ホルス テクノ 」
“Horse techno.” [ japanese horse techno playing ] [ music stops ] Why is there a… Why is there a dog fighting game? Better question: Why is there a construction truck fighting game? Oh my god. It has fatalities! OK. “Select baby!”. No. You can’t make this. You can’t make a baby fighting game. Why is this existing right now? Oh my god. Oh my god, what the fuck!? What, he killed – What is this?! [ loud baby fighting music ] What the fuck?! They get electrocuted?! The baby is crying! What the fuck? Oh, this one looks nice, they’re just fi – Oh my fucking god! What the fuck?! Why are they drowning?! [ sputtering ] With a fucking chain and a – chained to his – He’s fucking DYING! [ Japanese ] 「 おしゃべりする クマ との友達生活 」
[ Become friends with talking bears ] 「 しにゅうかできひゅうゲーム 」
[ in this new game: ] 「 クマト モ 」
[ Bear Friend. ] 「 もっとドンク 」
[ motto DONKU ]
[ more donk ]


100 Responses

  1. kkafei

    October 20, 2019 6:20 pm

    Fun fact: the song played during the Japanese Crash Bandicoot commercial is “ALIEN” by Maximum the Hormone, who also did the second Death Note opening. Just thought that was interesting.

  2. Grim Sleeper

    November 4, 2019 3:06 am

    Yes it's sad to be an American, but image having to have sex with horses like the Japanese.

    Dunkey actually speaks a few different languages.

  3. dildonius

    November 16, 2019 10:27 am

    The final minute of this video, from 2:23 to 3:23, is quite literally the most hilariously exhausting 60 seconds of any Dunkey video ever made. Possibly of ANY YouTube video. And if not, it's definitely up there. Holy FUCK, man! I'm actually sweating! Those poor babies!

  4. Loren Helgeson

    November 28, 2019 10:11 pm

    American ad: buy it, I guess.

    Japanese ad: ORA ORA ORA! Sumashu daisuke! ROCKETTO PAUNCH!!!


  5. Felipe Jaquez

    December 1, 2019 7:07 pm

    Japanese ads can be boiled down to a bunch of screaming and random XD rofl-cat Cheezburger rick roll humor

  6. xRENEGADE156

    December 4, 2019 9:14 am

    I feel like the "what the fuck" upon seeing the drowning babies was one of true horror and confusion

  7. Saadmaan Saakib

    December 12, 2019 12:09 pm

    I can’t believe you have Bangla Subtitles for this Dunkey !! I am from Bangladesh and this makes me so happy .

  8. The Ancestor

    December 20, 2019 2:53 am

    "Mom and Dad have been smiling and laughing"
    That sort of implies that they were not doing that before…

  9. Justin Carnemolla

    January 5, 2020 7:39 am

    Lmao the family is literally collapsing and the only thing keeping the parents from getting a divorce is a car racing game

  10. fryfry377

    January 13, 2020 9:41 am

    For anybody curious about the Japanese at the end of the video, it roughly translates into the same thing as at the end of every one of his fuckin videos.

  11. Dia Betes

    January 20, 2020 9:32 pm

    America: blind melon – no rain
    Japan: rage against the machine – bombtrack and wishmaster fused together

  12. KroneYT

    February 10, 2020 3:09 am

    Am I a weeaboo if I want to move to japan just to watch their commercials? Not anime, not culture, not food, not language, not history… just tv commercials.

  13. Niharika Tripathi

    February 11, 2020 6:55 am

    I had that baby fighting game along with miniclip shit 3mb games as my parents won't allow me to play mainstream realeses as i scored low in my exams when i was in grade 2.

  14. wooden hat

    February 22, 2020 8:43 pm

    “Something has been up with my family lately…

    because Mom and Dad have been smiling and laughing”


  15. C Muldeer

    February 25, 2020 12:09 pm

    Op de dag van de bruiloft van Rogier werd Cavia wakker met keelpijn. Nog in bed probeerde ze haar stem uit. ‘Hallo,’ zei ze in het niets. Het klonk als gepiep.
    Verder voelde ze zich in orde, dus er was geen ontkomen aan: vandaag zou ze haar ex zien trouwen met Juliette, de dunne vrouw.
    Na een kop thee zei ze nog een paar keer ‘hallo’ en dat klonk al beter. Ze zette haar feesthoed op en toog naar het kerkje.
    Een overactieve ceremoniemeester stond de boel te coördineren. ‘Alle stenen hier! Stenen! Alhier!’ Cavia liep naar de verzameling stenen en zag dat anderen de opdracht heel anders hadden geïnterpreteerd dan zij. Iemand had zorgvuldig en met krullige letters geschreven: ‘Love is the master key to happiness.’ Er lagen gepolijste bergkristallen tussen, en een bol van marmer. Zo onopvallend mogelijk probeerde ze haar grijze kei uit het tuincentrum erbij te leggen.
    De ceremoniemeester kwam bij haar staan en zei: ‘Apart hè? Hoe divers zoiets wordt?’
    ‘Ja, nou,’ kraakte Cavia.
    De ceremoniemeester keek haar onderzoekend aan. ‘En jij bent?’
    ‘Ik ben Cavia,’ zei Cavia met overslaande stem, ‘de ex van Rogier.’
    ‘Heel goed dat je er bent,’ zei de ceremoniemeester, en hij gaf een kneepje in haar schouder. Hij interpreteerde haar verkouden stem duidelijk als emotionele nood. Hij deed zijn ogen even geruststellend dicht en bleef ondertussen haar schouder vasthouden. Toen ademde hij hoorbaar in en zei: ‘Ik breng je alvast naar een fijn plekje in de kerk. Kun je lekker rustig even acclimatiseren.’
    En dus zat Cavia even later in haar eentje op een harde kerkbank. ‘Wat doe ik hier,’ vroeg ze zich af. Haar hoed jeukte, en ze probeerde voorzichtig onder de rand te krabben. Ze had nu al spijt van die hele feesthoed. Het zag er tien minuten leuk uit, maar je kon hem niet afzetten, want de vacht eronder zat helemaal plat. Zou ze nog weg kunnen sluipen? Kon je zoiets maken?
    Maar toen begon het orgel te spelen.


Leave a Reply